Six Pillars of Positive Parenting on Children You Must Know

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Without realizing there are many parents who apply parenting or negative approach of raising and educating children. This is due to the perception by frighten, scold, threaten, or compare one with another child, and usually parents feel their business succeed.

Being a parent was easy bother. The reason there are no special schools about how to be an ideal parent. As a result, many parents who apply parenting 'trial and error' capital parenting adopted imitate their parents first. In fact, past parenting is not necessarily suitable to be applied in the present.

However one should keep in mind, parents still need to learn to apply positive parenting (positive parenting) on ​​children in order to form the positive character of children in the future. Science parenting you can get from various sources, such as seminars or articles in magazines, internet and other literature.


According to Hanny Muchtar Darta, an Emotional Intelligence Parenting Consultant, there are six important pillars in the care of children. Unfortunately this has not been known to many parents.

"As a result, unwittingly, still many parents who apply parenting or negative approach of raising and educating children," said Hanny Muchtar Darta, as well as surgical launch his book, Six Pillars of Positive Parenting, in Jakarta, recently.

The first pillar is meant, partnership or cooperation between fathers and mothers (parenting partnership.) Parents must learn to work together well, especially in the teaching of values ​​to the child's life. There should be no difference of opinion in the teaching discipline and norms of life. Thus, the child will comply with parental guidance due to see both father and mother agreed to give the same view.

The second pillar consists of "4B", stroked, talking, playing, and thinking. According to the research of Dr. Harold voth, a psychiatrist from Kansas, United States, how many times caress you give the child every day will affect the growth-development. For example, four fondling the child in a day can make your child always survive.

"Eight fondling a day to support the growing child. While 12 fondling will make your child physically and emotionally healthy. The function is also valid for fondling a married couple. Fondling able to drive the depression, make us younger, sleep more soundly, and boost immunity, "said Hannah.

Parents are encouraged to establish communication with the child. Communication can be done in many ways, one by reading books to children and ask their opinions about the contents of the book.

Besides talking, parents also should take the time to invite children to play by involving physical. On the chance to play, the role of fathers much more likely to encourage children to do activities like sports or do other games.

"Not only physically play, children also should be taught to play by using exposure to the mind. This helps children to manage the natural mind. Exercise also helps children communicate thought what he was thinking because the mind is not necessarily the same children and parents, "said Hannah.

The third pillar, between parents and children always have an agreement in implementing discipline, and apply the rules consistently. The rules do not always have to be made by parents. For example in the agreed hours of learning. Children and parents can discuss, how many hours it takes the child to repeat a school lesson. Parents show love but with firmness.

The fourth pillar, parents must understand the negative emotions since early childhood. When our children are sad and cry, ask why she was sad, or what made him cry. We try to understand feelings of the child to repair negative emotions.

The fifth pillar, namely the importance of positive language style for the child physically and emotionally healthy. In this section, Hannah cites a statement from the Task Force for Personal and Social Responsibilities in America who explained that every day people listen to 432 words and negative sentences, and only 32 positive words and sentences. As many as 80 percent of those hurtful words, give a bad psychological effects, and do not motivate people to rise up. The rest, 20 percent of people survive even hears those words. Therefore, parents need to learn not to excessively angry, let alone threaten the child.

Sixth pillar, parents must apply the parenting without punishment. It turned out that punishment alone does not make the child is able to make positive changes. Parents should give freedom to children, not in the sense of complete freedom, but let him choose the consequences of the actions he did. Thus children can learn the lessons of what he had done.

Posted in: Parenting